Which Book Are You?

Who would you choose to fall for?

A rugged sailor.
The one you can't have.
The boss.
The goodlooking one who likes to play around.
A homeless vagabond.
Yourself.

What would you do if you saw a monster?

Kill it.
Scream.
Levy the troops.
Sleep with it.
Chase it forever.
Describe it.

How would you describe your personality?

Warped.
Heroic.
Indulgent.
Obsessive.
Neurotic.
Long-suffering.

Where do you like to spend holidays?

A country-house.
On a cruise.
Dublin.
London.
On the set of 'Queen for a Day'.
Anywhere there is lots of food.

What's your favourite drink?

Rum.
Small beer.
Ale.
Guiness.
Coca Cola.
Champagne.

If you were a politician, what would you legislate?

Hunting rights.
Mandated time off from work for hangovers.
Extension of copyright.
Limited prosecution of underage murderers.
Additional punishment of peasants who loot.
Additional rights for the height-challenged.

How do you enter a room?

With quietly modest heroism.
In a procession.
With my head down, but maniacally brandishing a weapon.
Worrying that I haven't sat in something nasty.
A different way each day, but always with a certain je ne sais quois.
With a harpoon cunningly hidden beneath my vest.

How do you indulge yourself?

Chasing tail.
Eating chocolate and smoking cigarettes.
Boring people.
Planning political intrigue.
How do I do what?
With mushrooms.

You would describe yourself as:

Misunderstood.
Brilliant.
Legendary.
Overweight.
An outcast.
Hot.

As an evening dress, I would look:

Like a cow.
Expensive and heavily decorated.
Like a French tapestry.
Like a fluffy prom dress.
Medieval.
Rough around the edges.

Have you answered all the questions?